2002-11-20
I've got friends in low places...
In the player: Hot Rod Circuit
Long, long, long day. Nine am to eight pm. My feet actually hurt this time. But now Im home, my bed is all comfy and my room smells of blackberries and cinnamon. Quite a lovely combination, I must say.
My friend Julie called today. I haven't talked to her in a couple of months now. One day, she came over whilst I was cleaning, got upset when I refused to drop everything and go out, and told me to call her later. I guess I never did.
Irritating how your best friend can meet a boy and forget about you in a matter of hours.
I expect if for a couple of days, but once it hit a year I believed I had the right to be a bit upset. We'd make plans, she'd ditch me for the drugs, alcohol, or break them for her guy, but invite me along when I told her how I felt. I never went, who would actually want to?
I have a hard time forgiving people, my close friends especially, when they make mistakes. I suppose I expect more of them. Years ago, a more naive me, let everyone come and go as they please.
Now, I know something about friendships, or any relationship for that matter, they have a principal of partnership. A sort of equality where everything goes both ways.
I call you, you call me. I buy dinner, you buy dinner, etc.. And when it stops going both ways, one person gets caught up in all the work. Soon enough, it becomes a part-time job of trying to keep in touch. Only you're not being conpensated, at all.
Bullocks I say. I was just never inclined to call her back. Bored of her excuses, her boyfriend, and of trying to make it work, all around her schedule.
Its funny though, she's done this plenty before. With all her other boyfriends in fact. Yet, when breakup time comes to par, guess who she needs for support?
The day she told me
"Rachel, no matter how bad I treat you, or how little I call or see you, you're a great friend because I know you'll always be there for me. You'll be my shoulder to cry on."
Sure, but what if I cease to care any longer?
lunaadored at 9:30 p.m.